Monday, August 25, 2008

Questions and answers

I want to know why reading eBooks, that is books in electronic form (.pdf/.lit/.word), is considered nerdier that just reading plain physical books. Given the time and age where 'e' is the prefix of choice for many activities, why is it that I get looks of "okayyyyyyyy" when I tell people that I'm reading electronically?

They're much easier to transport around,
take up very little space (depending on your reading medium), are technically better for the environment - no pages = no tree massacres = no landfill and well, if you know where to look, they're free. So why the discrimination?

Perhaps a better question.

Why do I get embarrassed telling people that I read eBooks?

I scoffed so hard when the Kindle was released. And now I'm reaping the benefits that a laptop and torrents can bring. I don't like being wrong in my assessment of things, but I'll always own up to my mistakes.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Only in dreams

I sleep a lot, hence I dream a lot. But that is not true. For me, it's always been more the case of I dream a lot, hence I sleep a lot. I never daydream while awake, but when asleep, man, my brain thinks up the wildest scenarios. And I have to admit that I really like these dreams. Which is why, I think I like sleeping so much.

The very first dream I remember having happened when I was six. I dreamt that I was somehow transported to the Land of Oz and all the major players were there - Tin Man, The Cowardly Lion, hell, even the Flying Monkeys. I suppose, it wouldn't be wrong to say that in that dream, I was playing the character of Dorothy. I don't remember how it ended. But I remember waking up feeling very unsatisfied, wanting to finish out the magical dream. No matter how I tried to reproduce the situations leading up to sleep time (not showering, sleeping at the same time, in the same position) I never revisited that dream, much to my disappointment.

Ever since then, I've had a variety of dreams, the majority which have been weirdly enough reality-based. By that I mean most dreams have been lacking such fantastical elements. Well, except zombies. But they're the undead. And fun. And possibly very real if you believe Cracked. Anyway, these dreams usually involve real people and real places, people I know and places I've been to. If you're my friend, I've definitely dreamt about you before. Not long ago a classmate from primary school who I haven't talked to in 14 years showed up in my dreams. It was very bizarre but nonetheless a nice surprise from this blast from the past.

Some of my dream highlights are:-

- dreaming every single one of my family, bar my sister, died (in separate sleeps). These three dreams remain the only ones I've woken up in tears. I don't know why Gill is the exception to the rule.
- Hanson appearing in my dreams (I was 11)
- dreaming I was a cop
- dreaming I was a track athlete
- dreaming I was an evil demon hunter ala Buffy or the Winchester boys from Supernatural
- lucid dreaming while sleeping in exams. During Form 5, whenever I would fall asleep during exams, I would always end up lucid dreaming. I would always be dreaming but I knew I was dreaming, so the dreams would be me trying to wake myself but no matter what I did I couldn't wake myself up. Those were fun times.

- a recurring nightmare that I used to have, that thankfully hasn't appeared in the past 2 years, so maybe I should say 'a nightmare I use to have' instead of recurring.

- running. I have run more in my dreams than I have in real life.
- adventure quests! These ones are very fun and I usually try to go back to sleep if awaken prematurely.

Recently, first of many previously undreamed dreams happened.

1) I dreamt in a whole different language. Needless to say, English is my main language, even in my dreams. But the other night, I ended up conversing in Bahasa Melayu for the first time. That was pretty funny. The next night, Cantonese was prevalent in my dream. Yet even though I barely speak or understand it, I understood everything.

2) For the first time ever, I appeared naked in my dream! I hear that it is a common dream and up until last week, it's never happened to me so I was very excited when I woke up to realize that I was naked in my dream. In that dream, I was at the beach and sun-tanning naked. Somehow I was caught on camera and that film was broadcast on mainstream TV at a diner where I was eating. I don't pretend to know what all this means. I just find it amusing that my dreams are so rich.

3) Since last month, I have been dreaming more frequently about taking pictures in my dream. I will usually be wielding my Pentax (I can't even dream up a DSLR, goddamn) and snapping away at everything. It's like I'm observing my dreamscapes and trying to take pictures to remember it all.

Last night I had another dream about taking photographs. For some inexplicable reason I was put in charge of a photoshoot, and when I tried wielding my digital camera, it literally fell apart in my hands. So I broke out my film camera and go to work, but I couldn't get the shot I wanted no matter what I did.

I don't think that all dreams necessarily have meaning. I certainly don't think that my dreams are anything more than random synapses in the brain. Most of them at least. I just thought I'd record this down for posterity.

If someone were to ask me if I am a dreamer, I would take a moments pause to deliberate on the implications of that question. I do not daydream, and I certainly don't have big aspirations or goals in life. But I am guilty of spending time in the unconscious realm and loving it. In every sleep, I hope to dream and when I don't, I feel strangely unsatisfied. In that sense, I suppose, I can answer an unabashed yes.