Tuesday, September 30, 2008

A Quick Recap of the the Life of a 21 year old Retiree

- Such is my life now that I can name you the value of every single letter according to Scrabble rules. Is are probably my least favourite vowel ever. Out of the 9 Is that can be found in a full set, I usually get at least 4 of them while playing. Argh. Hate Is.

- I actually won a match of Scrabble the other night. Since I lack a single competitive bone in my body, I usually couldn't be arsed as to how I finish. But man, Scrabble mojo was in the air and I was the pwnxorrs. Lady Luck was on my side and the tiles I pulled were absolutely beautiful. I finished just shy off 200 points. I'm thinking now would be a good time to retire the game since I doubt I'll be able to eclipse that performance in the future.

- Since I don't have any income to spend, I've been holding back on any kind of clothes shopping. Instead I've taken to pilfering my parent's wardrobe and working on altering their clothes to something I would wear. Assuming my sewing skills don't fail me now, there should be a smorgasboard of new clothes to wear in the future. I really want to break out my mum's sewing machine, but bearing in mind my disastrous experience with her kitchen mixers (3 dead and buried), I'm very wary. As is she understandably.

- I've sent my laptop in for much needed service finally. Friends will know that the ADSL port and internal speakers have been busted for close to two years now. Take relief in knowing that my poor laptop is finally getting some TLC downtime, guys.

- I guess I don't have the best track record when it comes to taking care of my electronics. Every mobile I've owned has always needed the assistance of a rubberband to be held together eventually. My SE k610i is going slightly schizoid on me now and switching off without warning. My laptop, of course, is currently enjoying what I imagine to be a relaxing spa holiday at the moment. And currently tape is the only thing that's keeping my Pentax from falling apart. For some inexplicable reasons, all the screws that held my camera together have fallen and disappeared in the 3 years I've owned it. I swear to Yahweh that I don't do anything out of the ordinary to ruin my things! It's not my fault they can't stand the heat. I refuse too baby my belongings and keep them in socks and pouches and the like.

- I suppose that's part of the reason why I covet the Suzuki Vitara JLX so badly. It's a pretty old ass model that even the manufacturer has retired, but my research tells me that it can hold it's own and withstand rough handling, scratches and the like.

- I've just received my tax returns and I'm deciding how I should use it:
a) Put it in my fixed deposit account (*yawn*)
b) Go on a holiday (Bali, maybe?)
c) Buy a new digital camera (*pants*)
I've sussed out the cameras I'm interested in purchasing and I've realized taking into consideration my very specific requirements, the options I have are severely limited. It all comes down to cameras made in 2004 that aren't exactly fresh on the market. I'm thinking perhaps the (hopefully) cheaper cost might outweigh the older technology? Or I could loosen up a little and cave on certain requirements. We'll see.

- 'Asshole' is the word of the moment; and out of respect to my religious friends, and newly religious brother, 'Ya Allah', the phrase. I don't understand how saying what is basically 'oh my God' in Malay acceptable and non-blasphemous if I'm still using God's name in vain anyway. But I guess that's just another little inconsistency in the logic of religion. Yeah, I saw the oxymoron there.

- A plane flight to Turkey awaits and I'll be off till the 9th of October. I hope to eat much Turkish food and soak up more history. Since it's Hari Raya all over, I'm banking on some marvelous sights indeed.

- Since I chose to my time updating this blog instead of replying to emails, I'm just going to use this as a platform to send messages to people who I owe emails to:

Nick: Greatness happened in Istanbul in 2005 and I get to go there and you don't.
Nye-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh. I can't say much for Fernando Torres, but I'm pretty goddamn awesome. :D Also, your room is bitch ass. I approve!

Ad: Sew more, woman! You've got some mad skills. You can be like little J in Gossip Girl, with the sewing and the DIY-ing.

Charm: Woman, three words: ESSAYS. NOW. GO. True Blood is so lulzy and I really dislike Anna Paquin as Sookie. But Daniel Craig is awesome! He's like a man's man. Not pretty like Chace Crawford or precious like Lee Pace. Manly man, man! Rawr.

Jon: I'll be sure to eat enough pita bread and hummus for you, kid. Have fun on your school break! Text us and tell us how you're doing and in turn I'll rub it in your face all that you're missing out on.

Jim: Dude, quit stalking me! Internet dating was made for people like you, so get on that!

Chrissy: I demand you set up a blog and write about your experiences while in UK. Or email us more often. Is it everything that you thought it would be? Were all your fears completely unfounded?

Sam: (I don't actually know if the Snakes reads this, but let's assume that she does) My glibness probably ruined my chances for this job I really want which I applied for. I couldn't help it. It was 6 in the am and I was running on zero sleep, you know how I get. How long do you reckon I should wait for a reply before getting the hint and pissing off?

All right then. Autobots, roll out.

Friday, September 12, 2008



Please believe me when I say I have the worst luck when it comes to Scrabble. Pictures cause it ALWAYS happens. More epic fail at my Flickr page.


Tuesday, September 09, 2008

The difference between

Moving back to a place I merely formally consider 'home' has been a very strange process. In the five years I've lived away, I have grown both mentally and physically and it feels like there exists this unbridgeable chasm between the mature adult and the teenager that remembers life differently (simpler). I will be Malaysia-based until further notice and I am gradually acclimatizing to the different living/social conditions here. While that's working out, I can't help but point out some traits that I find uniquely Malaysian:

1. Restaurants pile on the ice before pouring in the drink which leads to a cup of very diluted Coke after two minutes. Perhaps it's got to do with the warmer weather here, but man, 3/4 cup full of ice seems a tad extreme to me.

2. Of all the places I've traveled to, only in Malaysia do official forms require you to state your race. Given Malaysia's history, the topic of race is undoubtedly highly contentious. I have to wonder if there are ulterior motives for making the public divulge this little tidbit of information apart from census reasons. Which brings me to my next point.

3. It's a well-known fact that corruption is rife among our local government here. The fact that that is an undeniable fact, and not mere speculation or conspiracy theory trips me out muchly. People here are very passionate about bitching about the state of things.

4. I completely forgot how Malaysians mix other languages nonchalantly in their everyday conversation. Honest to blog, I don't know how that little Malaysian quirk slipped my mind considering it's so prevalent. It's rather amusing to have a conversation where one party is speaking in Cantonese while the other is answering in English.

5. In unrelated news, I actually detest the term 'honest to blog' which if you can't remember originates from Diablo Cody's Juno. I like the show well enough but I have to admit that the first 15 minutes annoyed me greatly with it's new-fangled hip lingo (observe: "That ain't no etch-a-sketch. This is one doodle that can't be un-did, homeskillet." ????!!!!?!?!?!?) and twee Moldy Peaches soundtrack to the so-cute-I'm-a-diabetic-now credits. Eeek.

6. Moving back on topic, the speech patterns and local slang here are definitely one-in-a-kind. I get called out for acting pretentious when I speak English, when really the only difference is I accentuate different parts of a word. I've never really used the 'localized' English commonly known as Manglish (Malaysian English) much, and I don't fancy being called a snob just because I refuse to ruin the English language in order to fit in. As if I don't get enough flack when speaking English, I also get called a banana when attempting to speak Cantonese/Mandarin and a poser when whipping out Bahasa Melayu. Sometimes I just can't win.

7. Malaysians like their brands very much - clothes, bags, cars. Is it a curious fact that snatch theives and robbers operate highly efficiently here?

8. I also forgot just how passionate Malaysians are about their food. We will drive to the other side of town for good satay or risk contracting food poisoning for the best seafood that is located at the dingiest ports. Hell, they'd probably drive all the way to Melaka to talk politics over a plate of chicken rice.

9. I suppose the last thing that stumps me about Malaysia is the fact that the international movies screened at local cinemas follow no certain order here. Australia follows the US quite closely in terms of new releases and being aware of the seasonal movie offerings in the States you learn to expect certain things. Like summer season in the States (June/July/August) means fun, frivolous movies for the fun seeking people on holiday. That means lots of comedies, kid-friendly flicks and mindless fluff, eg Tropic Thunder, The Dark Knight, Mamma Mia etc. while fall might mean more serious flicks, Oscar contenders and the like. The system in Malaysia seems not to acknowledge any of this. Wall-E and The Mummy 3 is out but so is Deception and Penelope, the former which bombed in Australia and the latter which doesn't even have a release date yet. I am so confused. This messes up everything.

10. And I'm not even going to start on movie censorship in Malaysia. All I will say is there is no point rating your movies if you're going to cut out all the cuss words/sex scenes/violent bits regardless of classification anyway.