Monday, August 27, 2007


This is the reason why Girlfriend got stuck in my head to begin with:

Wait for the sick 'guitars' from 2:11 to 2:18. And here's the recently released lyrics so you can sing along (cause you know you just want to)!

Hey hey bro bro
I don’t like your girlfriend
No dude no dude
I don’t want her around me
Hey hey bro bro
Can’t you dump your girlfriend?

Hey hey bro bro
You know she doesn’t like me
No dude no dude
I don’t want to see her
Hey hey bro bro
I want to kill your girlfriend

Best friend of mine ‘member the times we used to kick it?
Us hanging out every day it was the sickest.
Don’t you know that if you ditch that bitch we’ll chill all night (all night, all night)
Don’t pretend I think you know we had a friendship
and hell yeah bro, I really fucking miss it
I can tell you miss it too and That aint right.

She’s like a fucking headache
So take a stand, dude for our sake
I think you should dump that fugly cow
That’s what all the guys are talking about!

hey hey bro bro
We don’t like your girlfriend
No dude no dude
She’s ruining our summer
Hey hey bro bro
can’t you dump your girlfriend?

Hey hey bro bro
No one likes your girlfriend
No dude no dude
I’m not even kidding
Hey hey bro bro
I want to punch your girlfriend

I can see the way, I see the way she looks at me
and then she turns to you and probably makes fun of me
A friend would never let a girl come between us like that (like that like that)
So come over here and say it to me, to my face.
bring your girl, I wanna put that bitch in her place
I can’t believe you would do this to the bond that we had

Cuz she’s like a deadly cancer
It really shows you who your friends are
One last chance, dump your girlfriend now
or the dudes and I are walking out!

hey hey bro bro
We don’t like your girlfriend
No dude no dude
She’s ruining our summer
Hey hey bro bro
can’t you dump your girlfriend?

Hey Hey Bro bro
think she’s cheating on you
Yeah dude yeah dude
I saw her with some guy
Hey hey bro bro
Just trying to help you

You’re a bitch, she’s got you wrapped around her finger
Dude I know, I know you really sweat her
But she’s cheating, you’re looking like a moron
Drop the bitch dude, and come and get your beer on


Hey hey bro bro
Glad you dumped your girlfriend
No dude no dude
You made a good decision
Hey hey bro bro
Now we can be best friends

best buds, best buds

(repeat till end)

From CollegeHumor and lyrics by Streeter Seidell.

Sunday, August 26, 2007

The most random things happened on Friday

- In my Friday tute, one guy walked in wearing a vintage denim jacket. We're talking acid wash, straight from the 80s genuine vintage. The whole class agreed it was massively cool. And it was! Yet I had never been more appalled and strangely fascinated by a piece of clothing. Fashion has been going through an 80s revival for a while now. Some piece of clothings (tights), more successful than others (mom jeans). Seriously speaking though, acid wash is something no one should ever have to go through twice in their life. Unless it's at least 20 years old. Walking up to Supre and getting an acid wash jeans jacket somehow just isn't quite the same.

- Also in that same tute, someone came to class dressed in a pinstripe blue suit with Chucks on their feet and a pair of brown-rimmed classes. Much like this!

Turns out he was going to the Melbourne Uni Science Ball themed "Out of This World". I just about died when the dude pulled out a sonic friggin' screwdriver out of his pocket. That is just simply too damn awesome! Or we as a class are just too collectively geeky..

- Also for some reasons (I like to think because as a writing class, we've got to have good tastes), the majority of people in that same tute watch the same shows I watch. So after geeking out on Doctor Who, for some reason we started quoting Arrested Development. "Come on!" "I've made a huge mistake." "I'm the world's first analyst and therapist, 'analrapist'." It goes on.

- For all my talk of desperation, I ended up missing the Shout Out Louds concert on Friday. Instead, I caved to peer pressure and ended up bowling with the Maccas crew and Charm. It was amusing to see how competitive guys can get over the littlest sport. I think all that testosterone in the air made my arms a tad bit hairier.

- Right now I've got two songs stuck in my head:
Ashlee Simpson - Boyfriend
Avril Lavigne - Girlfriend

I could point out how "that's soooo funny" but my ears are still bleeding from the vocals while the throat is going hoarse from singing along. But it still doesn't stop. Add My Chemical Romance's "Welcome to the Black Parade" into the mix occasionally and this is what I mumble while alone:

"When I was a young boy,
my father took me into the city,
to hey hey, you you!
I don't like your girlfriend!
(no way no way)
she's ruining our summer,
I didn't steal your boyfriend."

Then my mind spontaneously combusts and the horror ends. A girl can wish.

Monday, August 20, 2007

Sleeping on the job

I can now use that phrase both figuratively AND literally.

Having slept 45 minutes over the weekend, I was brain dead and zombie quick (assuming we're not talking about the Dawn of the Day remake) during my shift on Sunday. It didn't help that it was the set up shift at 5.45 am. By 6.30, I was yawning like my life depended on it. By 7, I was walking as fast as the geriatric regulars who pop in for their obligatory Sunday muffins and lattes.

Then it happened.

I actually fell asleep while making a coffee.

No, really. I did.

It was a mocha. I remember putting the chocolate powder into the cup while fighting and struggling hard against the charms of the Sandman. Then the next thing I know, the heated milk jug is burning my hand. I stopped the steam wand. Wiped the spilled milk and took a look around. The chocolate powder container had been covered and put back into place. The coffee was in the cup ready for the milk to transform it from an espresso to a latte. It was routine as usual, yet I remember none of it. Exsqueeze me, but when did that happen?!

The 40 winks shuteye was good though. After that I had enough energy to last till I was done. Anyway if I wasn't feeling a smidgeon refreshed after the too-short-to-be-called-nap, the next order of 10 standard cappuccinos sure did wake me plenty.

So yeah, I astound myself. I always knew I can sleep anywhere but standing up? That's whole new unexplored territory!


In other news, thanks to Charmain of the Crazy Baker Woman fame, I got a free pass to watch an early preview of Stardust. It is so friggin' ace to watch one of my most anticipated movies of the year a whole month before it opens on general release!! And the movie? Well, to put it shortly, I fucking love it. Proper review when I get the time (and please excuse the pimpage) over here. Please hunt it down and watch it at theatres near you!

Friday, August 17, 2007

The future

At 3.43 am on Wednesday, 15 August 2007, I had a startling revelation. I knew exactly what my future held for me.

I will grow old and take up my birthright as the neighbourhood cat lady. I will be that old woman who has somehow collected dozens + many more cats in her life. My life, as I know it, will be overrun with cats.

Except because I might or might not be allergic to cats, I'll have a slightly deviated path from the token cat lady. Call me the modern cat lady. Instead of collecting cats, I'll instead have a large collection of cats of the lol variety. Y'know.. the lolcats.

Since realizing my imminent future, I've embraced it without reservations and in fact have decided now is a good time as ever to start.

Oh, trust me. There are many, many more saved on my hard disk.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Oh, Jon!

karen says:
if you don't get hungry easily now, then why did you eat so much in malaysia?
->> j o n™ <<- says:
hahahaha because that one i guess its because of the climate change

Thursday, August 09, 2007

Shout Out Louds

On the off chance, you're my friend who likes jangly pop music by a Swedish band in the vein of The Shins and will be in Melbourne on August 24th, or some random dude who arrived here through the algorithms of Google after a search for the Melbourne Shout Out Louds gig, well, (and this is where any remaining shred of shame swooshes out my life) want to go or care for a friendly tag along for the Shout Out Louds, Corner Hotel, Aug 24th gig?

I'm pretty sure I'll go even if it means going alone.
Cock it. You only live once, right? But it can't hurt casting out this wide net in the wide spaces of the intrawebs to see if I reap any results.

3304 - the refugee safehouse

My apartment has magical qualities. It attracts houseguests of the unwanted variety.

Take roommate #1 for example. Her boyfriend came and occupied the couch for a week and a half. He cooked the best smelling Asian meals but never offered any. He and his girlfriend were from the hardcore Mandarin speaking districts of China, so all their conversations seemed like arguments to my virgin ears. It only took the girl actually throwing food onto the floor for me to realize that an actual fight was going on. He wasn't rude but he smoked, so he stunk anyway. And best yet, the dude isn't even cute or have a good body to perve at. Call me superficial but if some dude is going to crash at my place, at least have the decency to be perve-worthy, you know? It's total incentive for me to not mind a hot dude staying. Especially if he sleeps without a shirt. Anyway, roommate #1 left for China permanently 2 days ago. He sent her off to the airport and for reasons that are escaping my head, came back here to sleep. He woke up 12 hours later, ate some noodles and did his laundry. Roommate #2 and I wanted to kick him out but we figured he was heartbroken and all that rot. Anyway, the dude finally left for good today. Turns out his cooking smelled so damn good because he used up all my garlic. Cheers, ya twat!

And now a female friend of roommate #2 has been sleeping over. Apparently she's fighting with her boyfriend. I honestly don't care anymore. I need to find the biggest dude I know and sponsor him our couch just because.

Jon, September break, yeah?

Lesson learned from these experiences:
Relationships are nothing but trouble. Even more so if your house happens to be a haven for all in need.

Thursday, August 02, 2007

In other news

- It turns out that prepping for the interview was a lot more nerve-wrecking than the actual interview. Of course, now I have to write it, and transcribing a taped interview is something I've never done before. This is kind of interesting.

- Rupert Murdoch takes over the world! Dow Jones.
In the past I have only half-seriously quipped that Murdoch is secretly pulling the strings behind world events. The joke is on you, idiot.

The pout is the proverbial cherry on the wave of anti-David Beckhamanism, no? Way to get the message across dude-in-the-white-bandanna!

Something tells me that dude-in-the-white-bandanna wouldn't have given Nicole his stamp of approval either.

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Zombie nation!

Zombie doll making party #4!

This is why I love my friends. And also why Snakes and the Chairman is never to leave the country ever again.

Tomorrow not for the first time ever I will be interviewing someone for an article. For the first time ever though, the article will get published. I hardly ever get nervous, not even when it's 3.20 pm and I'm 350 words away from finishing an essay that is due at 4. This random spurts of energy and adrenaline is rather interesting.

For the first time ever, here's something I wrote that I actually like!

Let me preface this review by stating the cardinal rule of theatre: Show up on time or don’t bother showing up at all. It’s an age old adage. One of few responsibilities an audience member has (no mobile phones or talking during the performance either). It is merely a simple sign of respect for the actors and production crew, who have choreographed, timed and perfected their piece without including interruptions of the whispered “so sorry, excuse me, had car troubles etc..” kind. The illusion of the performance on stage is shattered whenever some dickhead stumbles in the dark, groping for a spare seat while trying to do it as quietly (never works, mate) as possible.


It feels good to get that off my chest. I suppose it shall not come as a surprise when I reveal that there were a fair number of stragglers who crashed their way into the theatre much later after Romeo and Juliet had started. Cheers, tossers!

Too bad it had to be cut due to word space constraints.

Alanis, now this is irony.