The difference between

Moving back to a place I merely formally consider 'home' has been a very strange process. In the five years I've lived away, I have grown both mentally and physically and it feels like there exists this unbridgeable chasm between the mature adult and the teenager that remembers life differently (simpler). I will be Malaysia-based until further notice and I am gradually acclimatizing to the different living/social conditions here. While that's working out, I can't help but point out some traits that I find uniquely Malaysian:

1. Restaurants pile on the ice before pouring in the drink which leads to a cup of very diluted Coke after two minutes. Perhaps it's got to do with the warmer weather here, but man, 3/4 cup full of ice seems a tad extreme to me.

2. Of all the places I've traveled to, only in Malaysia do official forms require you to state your race. Given Malaysia's history, the topic of race is undoubtedly highly contentious. I have to wonder if there are ulterior motives for making the public divulge this little tidbit of information apart from census reasons. Which brings me to my next point.

3. It's a well-known fact that corruption is rife among our local government here. The fact that that is an undeniable fact, and not mere speculation or conspiracy theory trips me out muchly. People here are very passionate about bitching about the state of things.

4. I completely forgot how Malaysians mix other languages nonchalantly in their everyday conversation. Honest to blog, I don't know how that little Malaysian quirk slipped my mind considering it's so prevalent. It's rather amusing to have a conversation where one party is speaking in Cantonese while the other is answering in English.

5. In unrelated news, I actually detest the term 'honest to blog' which if you can't remember originates from Diablo Cody's Juno. I like the show well enough but I have to admit that the first 15 minutes annoyed me greatly with it's new-fangled hip lingo (observe: "That ain't no etch-a-sketch. This is one doodle that can't be un-did, homeskillet." ????!!!!?!?!?!?) and twee Moldy Peaches soundtrack to the so-cute-I'm-a-diabetic-now credits. Eeek.

6. Moving back on topic, the speech patterns and local slang here are definitely one-in-a-kind. I get called out for acting pretentious when I speak English, when really the only difference is I accentuate different parts of a word. I've never really used the 'localized' English commonly known as Manglish (Malaysian English) much, and I don't fancy being called a snob just because I refuse to ruin the English language in order to fit in. As if I don't get enough flack when speaking English, I also get called a banana when attempting to speak Cantonese/Mandarin and a poser when whipping out Bahasa Melayu. Sometimes I just can't win.

7. Malaysians like their brands very much - clothes, bags, cars. Is it a curious fact that snatch theives and robbers operate highly efficiently here?

8. I also forgot just how passionate Malaysians are about their food. We will drive to the other side of town for good satay or risk contracting food poisoning for the best seafood that is located at the dingiest ports. Hell, they'd probably drive all the way to Melaka to talk politics over a plate of chicken rice.

9. I suppose the last thing that stumps me about Malaysia is the fact that the international movies screened at local cinemas follow no certain order here. Australia follows the US quite closely in terms of new releases and being aware of the seasonal movie offerings in the States you learn to expect certain things. Like summer season in the States (June/July/August) means fun, frivolous movies for the fun seeking people on holiday. That means lots of comedies, kid-friendly flicks and mindless fluff, eg Tropic Thunder, The Dark Knight, Mamma Mia etc. while fall might mean more serious flicks, Oscar contenders and the like. The system in Malaysia seems not to acknowledge any of this. Wall-E and The Mummy 3 is out but so is Deception and Penelope, the former which bombed in Australia and the latter which doesn't even have a release date yet. I am so confused. This messes up everything.

10. And I'm not even going to start on movie censorship in Malaysia. All I will say is there is no point rating your movies if you're going to cut out all the cuss words/sex scenes/violent bits regardless of classification anyway.

Eugoogly: Mr Robbins of Baskin-Robbins

"Frankly, I never met a flavour I didn't like."
-Irvine Robbins, co-founder of Baskin-Robbins

via Baltimore Sun

Thank you for Jamoca Almond Fudge and Peanut Butter & Chocolate, sir. Your ice cream is really quite expensive but those two flavours make the five bucks go a long way in taste and quality.

[addendum]
This is post #200!

Links Almighty!

This is one of the funniest videos I've seen in a while.

See more funny videos at CollegeHumor

CollegeHumor, I think, is fast becoming one of the best websites for producing good comedy on the Internet. The rest of the site may be more male-orientated with the running frat-boy theme amongst the articles and the pictures, but I'm particularly enamored by their original videos. It's a combination of having good writers, decent enough means of production ie. sound/video editing, photogenic crew (seriously, there is no unattractive person working there) and buckloads of creativity. Most of the people working there end up creating such fantastic on-line personas that I get curious enough to start finding more information by means of stalking them on their blogs and Flickr account. Thank goodness that most of them have utilized the powers of Web 2.0 that their company banks upon.

---

In unrelated news, visit Faildogs.com.



Proving that cats aren't the only animal in the animal kingdom who bring the massive FAILs.

Oh.

More, you say?








Although that last one doesn't actually have anything to do with the dog.

---

In even more unrelated news, I really like Mondays and Wednesdays because in the mornings, this really adorable guy from one of the meat shops at Victoria Market comes by to get coffee for his shop. Before I knew he existed, his elder brother came in, and even then I was already slightly perving. Since he looks almost exactly like his brother, it's much easier on my conscience to ogle at said guy. Oh, and he gives the most spastic winks. Whenever I greet him, he says hi and winks, and I have to stifle a smirk. He probably thinks I have a weird-ass cheek-biting condition that prevents me from meeting his eyes. But he's seriously spastic! His whole face contorts and I think both eyes actually close when the supposed wink happen but that just simply adds to his level of adorability. Naturally. Gotta love cute guys with spastic winks at 6 am in the morning.

Yesterday I...

- slept a grand total of and hour and a half.
- went to Maccas and bummed around there.
- rushed home and rushed off to school again..
- was going to be a good student and spend productive time at the library!
- forgot to bring my wallet to school.
- learned that you CAN withdraw cash without any form of photo ID after all.
- realized that money withdrawed (for lunch) was useless as the student card was still needed in taking out books from the library.
- trudged home in mind-numbing brain-melting 37 Celsius degree heat.
- flung open the balcony door, pulled down the blinds and broke out the 6 pack and chips to a whoa-it's-so-bad-it's-good-or-maybe-not D.E.B.S..
- felt bad upon consuming all that mindless caffeine (yum, diet Coke) when I had no intentions of staying awake.
- sat outside the balcony while I contemplated and brooded about life to the soundtrack of Ryan Adam's Gold and 29. Ugh, how wanky.
- fell asleep for about two hours.
- woke up and got alerted by stomach that proper food was needed.
- proceeded to consume grapes and a bag of popcorn.
- spent the rest of the night whining about the stilted warm air.
- watched a lot of episodes in the College Humour's 'Hardly Working' series.
- finally took a shower.

Right now I...
- am loving the cooler wind that the wee hours of late night/early morning brings.
- am waiting for 5.30 am to come.

Rinse, wash, dry and repeat.

Psychologize me

I found this test to be most accurate in describing my personality. It is based on Carl Jung and Isabel Myer-Briggs typological approach to personality. Two points to the test for being based off renowned contributors to the study of psychology. But minus one for being found on the Internet which is just inherently dodgy.

Take it here.

I am an Introverted Sensing Thinking Perceiving, ISTP, kinda person. Here is my favourite line off the profile which I thought described me down to a T.

"...communication also tends to be a key issue, since they generally express themselves non-verbally. When they do actually verbalize, ISTPs are masters of the one-liner, often showing flashes of humor in the most tense situations; this can result in their being seen as thick-skinned or tasteless."

If I had a dollar for everytime I've been reprimanded for doing so, I wouldn't be able to wear my pants! You know... because I would have plenty of dollars... that are heavy... hence the pants dropping.

Ahem.

Alright, so maybe "master of one-liners" was a bit of a stretch.

We are one push away from the nest

A year ago, I was marvelling over the progress we've made in developing video-sharing capabilities on the Internet. YouTube had become a verb in our everyday lexicon and Google had just purchased YouTube for a mind-boggling amount of money.

October '07: The observations of a passive YouTube user. YouTube remains what it is. We get the funny animals, music videos and people playing the theme to Mario using a variety of musical instruments. Sure, NBC and other official TV networks may have an official 'director' pages now, but that is hardly ground breaking. Skilled users could have just as easily ripped the very same content from their official website. For the most part, things remained the same. The same grainy low-quality videos existed and proliferated throughout the system.

And then Adobe, of the magical Flash player that YouTube and most video sharing websites utiliz, launched their Moviestar version of flash player. High definition TV quality for the Web? The future never seemed more promising. Yet there was talk of a revolution, but little action. Until now.

Vimeo has taken up the challenge and launched HD quality videos on their site. And the result is nothing short of amazing. For far too long we've come to accept crappy quality videos as the only option. Vimeo is leading the charge in the HD Video Revolution, and it is a hell of a promising start. Here's a wake up call to other video-sharing sites. It's time to bring your A game, fellas. Cause now that we've had a taste of it, it's fair to say that we're not going to expect complacency for much longer.

Article: Vimeo Showcases the Future of HD Web Video on Computer.

Girlfriend

This is the reason why Girlfriend got stuck in my head to begin with:



Wait for the sick 'guitars' from 2:11 to 2:18. And here's the recently released lyrics so you can sing along (cause you know you just want to)!

Hey hey bro bro
I don’t like your girlfriend
No dude no dude
I don’t want her around me
Hey hey bro bro
Can’t you dump your girlfriend?

Hey hey bro bro
You know she doesn’t like me
No dude no dude
I don’t want to see her
Hey hey bro bro
I want to kill your girlfriend

Best friend of mine ‘member the times we used to kick it?
Us hanging out every day it was the sickest.
Don’t you know that if you ditch that bitch we’ll chill all night (all night, all night)
Don’t pretend I think you know we had a friendship
and hell yeah bro, I really fucking miss it
I can tell you miss it too and That aint right.

She’s like a fucking headache
So take a stand, dude for our sake
I think you should dump that fugly cow
That’s what all the guys are talking about!

hey hey bro bro
We don’t like your girlfriend
No dude no dude
She’s ruining our summer
Hey hey bro bro
can’t you dump your girlfriend?

Hey hey bro bro
No one likes your girlfriend
No dude no dude
I’m not even kidding
Hey hey bro bro
I want to punch your girlfriend

I can see the way, I see the way she looks at me
and then she turns to you and probably makes fun of me
A friend would never let a girl come between us like that (like that like that)
So come over here and say it to me, to my face.
bring your girl, I wanna put that bitch in her place
I can’t believe you would do this to the bond that we had

Cuz she’s like a deadly cancer
It really shows you who your friends are
One last chance, dump your girlfriend now
or the dudes and I are walking out!

hey hey bro bro
We don’t like your girlfriend
No dude no dude
She’s ruining our summer
Hey hey bro bro
can’t you dump your girlfriend?

Hey Hey Bro bro
think she’s cheating on you
Yeah dude yeah dude
I saw her with some guy
Hey hey bro bro
Just trying to help you

You’re a bitch, she’s got you wrapped around her finger
Dude I know, I know you really sweat her
But she’s cheating, you’re looking like a moron
Drop the bitch dude, and come and get your beer on

(repeat)

Hey hey bro bro
Glad you dumped your girlfriend
No dude no dude
You made a good decision
Hey hey bro bro
Now we can be best friends

best buds, best buds

(repeat till end)

From CollegeHumor and lyrics by Streeter Seidell.

In other news

- It turns out that prepping for the interview was a lot more nerve-wrecking than the actual interview. Of course, now I have to write it, and transcribing a taped interview is something I've never done before. This is kind of interesting.

- Rupert Murdoch takes over the world! Dow Jones.
In the past I have only half-seriously quipped that Murdoch is secretly pulling the strings behind world events. The joke is on you, idiot.






















The pout is the proverbial cherry on the wave of anti-David Beckhamanism, no? Way to get the message across dude-in-the-white-bandanna!























Something tells me that dude-in-the-white-bandanna wouldn't have given Nicole his stamp of approval either.

My Favourite Bookmarks

I admit, I'm a regular 'bookmark' hoarder. I bookmark pages I like, pages I think are interesting, or pages that I want to read in the future on a regular basis. My bookmark list used to scroll right off the screen. After organizing it, it's hardly any cleaner, but there certainly are more categories now. Sheesh. Anyway, these are a few of my favourite bookmarks.


Lip Dub - Flagpole Sitta by Harvey Danger from amandalynferri on Vimeo

This video above is, dare I say it, the best video out there in the world wide web. Much like OK Go's 'Here We Go Again', this video combines creativity and choreography with the added bonus of the charm that can only come from an infectious group energy and spontaneity. Give it a watch and I promise you will never listen to that song again in the same light!

- 40 Greatest Internet Superstars as compiled by VH1.
Honestly, I have yet to watch Internet superstar number #1 in action. Anyone care to verify that it's greatness far outweighs Tila Tequila's infamy?

- After re-evaluating Episode 4-6 in light of Episode 3, are R2D2 and Chewbacca the true heroes behind the Star Wars saga?

If we accept all the Star Wars films as the same canon, then a lot that happens in the original films has to be reinterpreted in the light of the prequels. As we now know, the rebel Alliance was founded by Yoda, Obi-Wan Kenobi and Bail Organa. What can readily be deduced is that their first recruit, who soon became their top field agent, was R2-D2.

And with regards to dear ol' Chewie:

20 years earlier, Chewbacca was second in command of the defence of his planet. He's there in the tactical conferences and there on the front lines and is a personal friend of Yoda's. When he needed reliable people to join the embryonic Alliance, who else would Yoda turn to but his old friend from Kashykk? Given his background, there is no way that Chewie would spend the crucial years of the rebellion as the second-in-command to (sorry Han) a low-level smuggler. Unless it's his cover. In fact, Chewie is a top-line spy and flies what is in many ways the Rebellion's best ship.

Personally, I'm not fully convinced that R2D2 is all that the article makes it out to be. The article does make me rethink Chewie's importance in the saga.

- Marketing in terms of gaming consoles: A look at Marketing-Push (Sony and Microsoft) vs Evangelism-Pull (Nintendo and Apple).

Nintendo and Apple products are being effectively pushed by evangelists. Sure, slick advertising augments these more organic efforts, but make no mistake: in general, people that own Apple products love them and talk about them. Frequently. The same with Nintendo and the Wii. I just can't get people to shut up about these products. But I can't say the same for Microsoft and Sony, notwithstanding how cool or slick their graphics are or how many features and functions their consoles have.
- by Roger Ehrenberg @ Information Arbitrage

In terms of gaming consoles, I'm certainly more intrigued by the Nintendo Wii. I've played games on my friend's XBox, and whether it's because I'm not a hardcore gamer or otherwise, I found the many buttons to be very distracting. Of course, no need to go into the Apple fanatics. No other company can come close to catching up with the success Apple has have with the digital music revolution. With the iPhone releasing soon in the US, that group of the population is surely pissing themselves with excitement.

- 100 words every high school graduate should know.
I fail at life. There are at least 10 words I've never even heard of and a quarter that I don't know the meaning of. FAIL!

Tidbits

Here's something to chew on while you wait for the next Judd Apatow movie to roll into cinemas near you.

When employed correctly, improvisation can be a glorious thing, but I feel like it's increasingly used as a crutch for lazy filmmakers. Ideally, filmmakers start with a strong script and improve it through improvisation. But more often, it feels like the studio starts off with a really weak script that they figure an Owen Wilson or Will Ferrell can single-handedly save via improvisation. The result is an endless parade of half-assed, kinda-okay movies with a smattering of good ideas and funny scenes that would benefit greatly from a few more drafts and a lot more discipline.
- excerpt from Is Improvisation Ruining Film Comedy at The A.V. Club.

While I didn't think The 40 Year Old Virgin was all that it cracked up to be, I cannot get over Anchorman. I am super psyched for Knocked Up (5 July) and Superbad (20 Sept). Also am itching to get a copy of Wake Up, Ron Burgundy: The Lost Movie.

Today I...

...got a text message from my mum that said verbatim, "Jon, dad n I will be going 4 spiderman 3 show 2night." I already knew from my brother's blog that he was going for the early premiere. He failed to mention that my parents would be going along too.

I have a feeling I'm being incredibly petty, but the fact that my parents are watching Spiderman 3, probably the most bomb-diggity sequel (triquel?) of the year, is bugging me heaps. It doesn't help that Channel 10 runs the damn trailer every damn ad break during Big Brother. Yeah, so I'm obviously jealous but what bugs me the most is how my dad will not appreciate the immense event that is Spidey 3. Fanboys/girls, comic book geeks and nerds alike know what I'm talking about. My dad is the same dude who only goes to the cinemas to watch Jackie Chan movies and Bond movies. I mean, he watched Lord of the Rings: Part 3 without watching the first two and made me sit next to him to explain everything that was going on! His thoughts after the movie? "Why are those two hobbits (Sam and Frodo) like the homosexuals, Karen?" Sheesh.

Anyway I'm going to avoid my brother's blog until I watch the movie because although I tell him not to post any spoilers I just know that that little shit will with much glee to boot. Fuck, I probably would. Technically everyone knows how it's going to end - Spidey will emerge victorious, Mary Jane will live regardless of mortal peril, and the bad guys will get taken down. But I'll be damned if I find out HOW he gets there. So, dong ma Jonny? I'll visit your blog again after May 3rd, you sneaky little kid.

---

... also found this site online that creates a word cloud of common words that appear on your blog. Insert your blog URL and let the little robots work their magic! Below is my word cloud.
Very amusing how the numbers one, two and three appear so often but four doesn't even rate a mention. I don't even remember using them much. I am pretty amazed that 'awesome' came up so little seeing as to how I abuse it so much in my vernacular. Go get one of your own and see what words you've been abusing!

add-on: Oh! I get it! One, two, three. Season one/two/three! Shows I watch hardly ever reach season four. I am the best damn blogger (three other majorly used words) ever!

Earthlings

If you've never heard of the documentary Earthling, well, on the verge of being patronizing, lucky you. Having heard of this notorious doco, I hunted it down and after viewing it, I almost wish that Earthling to me was nothing but the word 'earthling' in italics. Not because it is bad by any means, but the stark truth of the film sears itself into your brain, leaving you unable to ever feign ignorance at the subject matter.

In short, the doco is about animal rights. Yeah, I can hear the groans already but this film is not PETA propaganda material. It doesn't resort to the organization's irritating and ultimately self-defeating 'shock tactics'. It does tend to fall on preachy grounds but given the obvious direction of the subject matter, it's hard not to.

What I thought was the most interesting thing about the doco was the idea of speciesism it expounded on. The idea is that we, top-of-the-food-chain-bearer-of-opposable-thumbs humans, are guilty of not including other living planets on the Earth when we use the term 'earthling', therefore unconsciously practising deplorable acts to what we view as lesser species. Hence, the -ism. The practice of speciesism is divided into 5 sections:

1. Pets - that we own these free creatures and expect them to serve us = a big no no.
2. Food - hidden-cameras taken into slaughterhouses allow us explicit footage of what really goes behind those walls.
3. Clothing - self-explanatory
4. Science
5. Entertainment - animals as exhibitions at zoos, circuses

For the most part I found that even if I didn't fully agree with everything said in the doco, the graphic content sure did have some truly stomach churning moments. These are my thoughts on the 5 sections humans are most guilty of in specieism. I should probably warn you that there will be spoilers. I would prefer if you, dear reader whether friend or random visitor, watched the film before reading on but if you can't stomach gore (and I mean, real life gore, not the CGI stuff you see in horror films or in CSI), then by all means. Hopefully my horrible grammar and inarticulacy will be no deterrent.

For those interested, you can watch the film online here. It runs for 95 minutes.

---Here be SPOILERS---

To begin, I should tell you that I would call myself a selective animal lover. In the sense that I love some animals more than others. Whales and wolves would be at the top of my list (and not just for alliterative purposes), whereas pigeons and guinea pigs are right down there. It's horrible and hypocritical but it's the truth. Besides, I never said I was a nice person. Alright.. onwards to my thoughts on the film.

1. Pets
Having never had a pet, apart from the one day Baxter affair (see: Flickr), I can't claim to know the motivations behind keeping a pet. Friends who have pets lavish them with so much attention and care that it's hard to believe that people will rear pets for any other reason besides adding another member to the family. Yet, there exists puppy mills where pets are bred for profit. And pets that have outgrown their rearer's comfort zone only to be abandoned. It's a sick world and I lead a charmed life, pardon the ignorance. Pet shelters can only do and keep so much abandoned pets. As humane as the concept of euthanasia is, it's still chilling having to watch actual footage of dogs slumping over five seconds after receiving the lethal injection. Worse still is the footage of inproper extermination, eg. cyanide in food. Euthanasia may be the most humane process but also the most expensive and in the end the mighty dollar speaks last. This segment lauds owners who haven't more than one space for a pet yet leave them unneutered because the excess of breeding goes to become landfill waste in the long run. Which I have to agree with for even if you do manage to sell your pets, there's no telling how well they will be treated or even how long they might hold the buyer's attention.

2. Food
When I tell people that I don't consume shark fin's soup (on the grounds of animal cruelty), I often get asked if I'm a vegetarian/vegan. I go on to tell them that no, I love my chicken too much to ever give it up, eating veges only is madness! how bout you? After watching this doco, I have to ask myself why the hypocritical partiality to sharks? Then I examine my life a bit more and have to admit that the main reason behind abstaining from pork for four years was not because of an objection to the breeding conditions of the pig, but borne out of an obsession with Jewish culture. I realize now that the looming extinction of a creature has had a lot to do with my food choices. That realization was affirmed while watching the doco because the parts I squirmed the most was during the footage of whale hunting. Having always had a soft side for whales (they are my second favourite mammals after humans), watching the visceral footage was horrible. There are, of course, equally visceral imagery regarding poultry, beef and pork slaughterhouses, which really affirms everything we've heard about the practices in these places. It's not really a question of whether we shouldn't eat meat. It's the circle of life. What really matter is if it's right to torture animals so grotesquely before we consume them. To give them hormone injections to bulk them up, to force animals into pens that can only hold a tenth of them is against what nature prescribed, is it not? I wonder if having an image attached to the rumour-turned-truth will prevent me from buying crispy strips off KFC. I'll tell you in a week.

3. Clothing
Alright, so that really weaned me off my hunt for the perfect leather jacket. Touché. No mink either, point taken.

4. Science
This is the section that I want to agree with but can't. When I was fourteen, I fancied myself an antivivisectionist. I was against all use of animal in product testing or medical research, the whole righteous she-bang really. Then I turned fifteen and in biology class, I happily spliced a frog open without much hesitation. It wasn't even in the name of science for me, just morbid fascination. Two years later I talked with a friend's mother over dinner about her work in scientific research and the use of animals in said field. Now, at the age of twenty, I have to admit that I am a pro-lab rat kinda person. In the doco, it was mentioned that the use of animals are wasted as these medicines are tested on humans in later clinical trials. To my understanding, those medicines/products used in clinical tests have been finely modified and worked upon after the results of the tests on animals. So really what the humans are receiving is at that point, the most perfect formulation after trial and error. I don't know what would happen to humans if they received the rawest product. Does anyone remember the international crisis a couple years ago where four humans reacted badly to a clinical test in Germany? I don't remember the specifics but the global reaction was urgency at its finest hour. I imagine that if animal testing was outlawed, that event would be a weekly occurrence, and for those who can't remember, it was urgency bordering on terror. I suppose to make clear, I am an advocate of donating human bodies to science as well. There is a lot of people dying of cancer. Need we add to the death toll on the quest to find a cure for cancer?

5. Entertainment
The doco made clearly the difference in zoos and conservations. Our natural curiosity of the exotic is the basis behind zoo operations, the film states. Which come to think of it, is quite true. Very rarely do zoos serve conservation purposes. Living in captivity is surely not healthy for the creature. Keiko, the whale from Free Willy, anyone? What really drove the point home was the bull-fighting footage. It's just wrong, what they do to the bulls to get them to 'fight'. They prod, poke, tighten reins, stab the bulls- all in the name of entertainment. Humans are the worst kind of species because we not only force other species for our entertainment but have no qualms in using fellow human beings too; the gladiators in ancient Rome comes to mind, or a more recent example, the leaked pictures of prisoner abuse in Abu Ghraib. WWE, people! I have no idea why I brought that last point up, just thought it needs to be made clear that despite the best of our intentions, all of us are guilty of being speciesist. And too easily entertained by men in lycra.

I think that at the end of the day it's a dog eat dog world out there. Only the best survive, right? Darwin and all that rot. Yet I can't help but feel for our fallen earthlings, especially those killed because some people had too much a passion for fashion. I wished that slaughterhouses in the world would only use the most humane methods in killing livestock, yet I know profits are the order of the day so expenditure must be kept to a minimum. I wished I could say I wasn't a speciesist, that to me all animals are equal, but I laughed pretty badly at the footage of the 'pigeon bowling' sport. I'm a little confused, and I'm not sure what to do to ensure that animals can at very least be granted a humane death so all I can think to do is to pass the message on so that at bare minimum no one can feign ignorance at the extent we mistreat animals. Hopefully I've done that. Thanks for reading.

Blogger Beta?

I find it hilarious how hard Blogger is pushing for users to switch over to Blogger Beta. It used to be a small line at the start of the log-in page and now it's taking up three quarters of the top page when you're logged-in and at the Dashboard. It looks fairly promising, what with it's new privacy controls and post labels features, but it took my technologically-challenged self effing forever to 'master' the HTML knowledge needed to tweak blog templates, and I'm unsure about their new 'drag + drop' template editing (read: what will happen to my mad HTML skillz??). Anyway, if anyone reading this has already switched over, do leave a comment about what it's like over at the Beta side. Is it greener there?

I've been playing with the idea of starting a month-long photography project for a while now and two days ago I finally decided to commit it. The project is this: for an entire month, I will take at least one photo a day, a documentary of sorts, if you will. The photos can be of anything; an interesting event of the day, something that caught my eye, a fly on the wall.. there are no rules. I was inspired by an article at Photojojo, a really good and innovative photography blog, about a guy who took a 365 photos for an entire year. The end product were memories that were immortalized on film. Of course, I don't think I have the patience to go through an entire year, so I'm making it a month, with an option to extend of course.

It makes for good practice for people like me who want to move past the 'point and shoot' photography stage and it is also fun, or so I read. So for an entire month, I'll be snap-happy and if I meet you be accomodating and willing, yeah? Wishing you thanks in advance!

I went around campus and the city yesterday, running errands and taking pictures and most of it are uploaded on my Flickr page so mosey on over if you're interested. Rather unexpected was the 'graffiti' theme in a number of the photos taken, some funnier than others.







The last one is actually a wall at Melbourne Central, but I think the spray painted sign at the top wasn't in the original conception of the wall art. I could be wrong, but who cares. I'm still amazed I've never seen that wall although I go into Melbourne Central at least once a week.

Also, as an additional challenge for myself, multiple photos that I am included in must have me flashing something besides the generic grin. Seriously. There's only so many pictures I can view where I am wearing the stupid inane grin before I go crazy and want to cut /digitally erase myself out.

Stupid Apple.

And by that I don't mean the spawn of Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin. I'm actually talking about Steve Jobs' Apple. Not his Adam's Apple, but his other Apple. The company, Apple. Ya dig? Oh Karen, here's a dead horse. Flogging it much?

After my iTunes version 4 ceased to work anymore last week, I caved and downloaded the most recent version, #6. Then a couple of days ago, Steve Jobs unveiled version 7. So, while I had that one fleeting moment of being in touch with new-fangled software techonology, that pleasure has been viciously ripped away from me to be replaced with a "iTunes version 7.0 is now available. Would you like to download it?" or a similar-themed pop-up whenever I open my iTunes. Damn you bad timing + Steve Jobs.

Among other things introduced during the Apple press conference is the latest version of the iPod Shuffle. On a completely irrelevant tangent, I am suddenly reminded of Derek Zoolander's mobile phone.

I will stop posting links in a bit. It's just with the usual burden of writing up essays, comes the onslaught of fascinating webpages that have the habit of being found when time really need not be idled away.

(I know I'm really pushing it but..)

In other news, the MPAA has taken legal action against Chinese pirates. MPAA = Motion Picture Association of America, to the clueless. Talk about losing a war before the fight even begun. Frank Rittman, an MPAA lawyer says

"buying pirated movies hurts the industry and makes it difficult for movie makers to make new films."

So many flaws with that statement, oh, where to begin.
1) The amount of hurt piracy does to the industry is miniscule when advertising and licensing for a film is taken into consideration. Plus everyone knows the money comes in through merchandising anyway, re: Star Wars.

2) Budget is just one small problem film makers have to face. The biggest being getting the attention of the movie executives to begin with.

3) Movie execs enjoy banking on the familiarity of old school movie makers that have helmed production in the past. Inexperience equals no go in Hollywood, which is totally unfair because people like Brett Ratner undeservedly gets the spotlight where else the Matthew Vaughns and Rian Johnsons of the world lurk in the background.

4) If by 'new films' you mean remakes and sequels.. then say it with me folks, viva la piracy!

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To end, I would like to say Ad, I've seen the trailer for The Departed three times, and maybe it's the essay galore I'm in the midst of right now, but I don't get it. Like somewhere, somehow it should make sense, but it doesn't. I think my brain is physically incapable of seeing someone else in Tony Leung's role. I did notice the gratuitious sex scene though.. good on ya, Scorsese, cause everyone knows that sex plays such a vital role in the plot of the movie!

Lest you hear it elsewhere

Oxymoron of the 21st Century: Silent ringtones.

Honest to God, I'll stop blogging about stupid things people come up with when stupid people stop coming up with things.

This just made my month.

The Infomation Super Highway.

If you are in a country where Snakes on a Plane hasn't opened yet, or if like me, you want to watch it yet don't want to fork out money to watch them motherfucking snakes on a motherfucking plane, read this unabridged review/cheat-sheet here. I think the transcribed experience will far outrank any number of viewings in a cinema.

For the pop-culture enthusiast, Fametracker is the site for you. Created by one of the writers of Television w/o Pity, the site is a pop culture geek's wetdream with the added bonus of snark, snark and more snark. Unfamiliar with the concept of snark? Read the Keanu Reeves fame audit and henceforth may your world be more enlightened and snark-ful.

I don't make it a habit to read blogs of celebrities cause on the off-chance that there is an update at all, 95 percent of the content is plugs for their current product/venture. That being said, I will admit to frequenting Zach Braff's site cause plugs aside, he is actually funny on occasion. Either he's hamming up the goofy J.D persona on Scrubs or somewhere, somehow the line between reality and fiction blurred and coagulated around Braff's real-life character.

Also, not that this is particularly relevant right now, but Phil Keoghan's blog (host of) that correlated with the most recent season of Amazing Race makes for a really good read, if only because you find out how the intricacies of the show. For example, although we don't see it on the show contestants actually have to buy four tickets when flying, the extra two for the camera crew that is. A whole new insight (and appreciation) to be gained after reading Phil two cents' worth into the production aspect of The Amazing Race, plus the truth behind BJ and Tyler's orange pants.

One pitfall of celebrity sites: while I may love Travis Barker, the drummer, I absolutely loathe Travis Barker, the blogger. His writing style.. urghh. Bane of my existence, I tell ya. He might as well tYpe LiKe ThIs!!!#!!!

And for chuckles, here's something else for the attention span-challenged people. Created by Amir Blumenfeld, one of the writers for CollegeHumor, it's a whole bunch of video away messages that AOL users can use in place of plain text away messages. I get that we in Asia/Oceania don't use AOL but it is definitely funny to see these shorts regardless of. Plus, should MSN ever evolve to include video away messages, this would be an inspiration for something a little less dull than a a video of us holding up a hand-written 'brb' sign.

Finally, to see why should I ever have a middle name it would be 'shameless', click Spag's "The Krispy Kreme Adventure" post. Donuts, warm weather and good company.. I AM GOD.

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From Clerks 2,
"Is that the fucking bible?"
"Hey, hey. The holy fucking bible, son."

God, I love that movie. It doesn't quite compare to the first installment, I'll admit. And while the pacing was quite erratic and the character of Elias alternating between geek and pitiful-wretched-being annoying, for 97 minutes the general audience, plus me, had a really good time. There were claps, "hell yeahs" and cries of "What the fuck?" followed by huge laughter throughout the film. I noted that the crowd was basically made up of college-slacker-kids and yuppie-type-professionals and whether they were there because they were fans of number one (looks to be it) or because Miami Vice was sold out (highly unlikely X 1000000000), they certainly added to my viewing pleasure.

The movie was one big cinematic lovefest; from Kevin Smith's promise to Jason Mewes that if he got off drugs successfully the role of Jay would be revived one more time, to the 100000 Myspace friends that were credited at the end of the movie to the use of Harley Quinn Smith (best celeb kid's name ever), Kevin's kid and his wife, to the cameos by Jason Lee and Ben Affleck, past players in the ViewAskew universe.. It is one giant "up yours" to bland comedies with Owen Wilson playing lovable rascals, to movie executives who refuse to cast a role, let alone a lead one, to an unknown actor, to shitty scripts who attempt at realism but come off fake, to drugs, to living the rat race, to corporations, to yuppies and especially, Hollywood. Most of all, this is love between Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes, Kevin Smith and the Weinstein Company, to geek culture, to Star Wars, and most definitely, Kevin Smith's wit and his love for words.

Hell, should I ever be on the verge of suicide, remind me to watch Randal's interpretation of The Lord of the Rings trilogy, and all will be good again. Brilliance on the cusp of true genius.

The Anti-Christ himself.

Meet Roy Lee.

Who, you say?

- Did you laugh at Hollywood's attempt at plot advancement in The Ring when the marbles that fell magically created an arrow, thus enabling Naomi Watts and her hopelessly clueless ex-husband to move on to Act 3: Scene 5?

- Did you pass your time fantasizing about what would Buffy do while watching Sarah Michelle Gellar 'be terrified out of her wits' in The Grudge?

- Did you weep while watching The Lake House not because of Keanu "Handsome Plank of Wood" Reeves but for the fallen memory of the original?

- Did you shake your hands at the heavens and yell out "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?" (or the cyberspace equivalent of that) when you found out that Hollywood was going to bastardized Infernal Affairs? Putting some pretty boy blonde hair may draw in the masses but fuck will it mess up a legendary movie and how.

Roy Lee; executive producer, nifty businessman, bastard extraordinaire.

According to this article, his sales pitch is this:

"[Lee] would explain to Asian distributors that their films would probably never sell in America, because Americans hate movies with subtitles, and that they would make more money selling the re-make rights anyway."

Erm, one, way to generalize the American audience, asswipe. And two, the Asian market in itself comprises of different countries and a wide range of languages and if it don't bother us here where we amount for 61% of the world's population, why the hell should we bend over for America? (Run on sentences are more apparent when I'm livid)

Yes, yes, I get that Hollywood is widely seen as the pinnacle of accomplished movie-making and to make it there is to be a god, but to have your product mangled and maimed six ways from the original, is that really worth it? Also, I get that Hollywood is a commercial enterprise where demand/supply meets (though not always consistently) and Roy Lee is merely another business man trying to make a quick buck so don't try to spin that argument on me.

What troubles me so is the quality of the remake is so often substantially inferior to the original. The original Ringu had less 'shock value' but christ, when that girl came out of the TV.. if you watch it again, pay close attention to her movements. Da-yum! And I suppose you could argue that the quality of the movie is really the resposibility of the director and editting team. But really, you want to rip the heart and gut it good to kill the hydra, not cut of one of it's heads.

Go ahead and ruin Battle Royale, why don't you? Just one more notch on your bedpost of "Asian Movies that I've Fucked Over."

[/add on]

At time of post, Roy Lee has yet to acquire the re-make rights yet, so there may still be hope.

Also, I am quite the rabid fan of Battle Royale. Not so much the movie but the Anglosized manga comics. What is Battle Royale? It's a Japanese novel that became a manga series that was made into a new manga series with English words that was made into a movie that developed cult status that will most likely be re-made in Hollywood should Roy Lee get his way.

Depending on which outlet you first accessed that film, the story is set in a future Japan that is in a state of quasi-anarchy due to their economic collapse. The government subscribes to the rule of totalitarianism to keep the people in check and free will is non-existent on the streets of future Japan. To keep the teenagers in school, the government has created a reality-TV type programme called Battle Royale, where one class in year nine will be randomly selected to participate in. The premise of Battle Royale is simple; the kids are shipped off to an island where the last one standing will be proclaimed winner and allowed to go home. I use the term 'last one standing' in the most literal sense. Survivor of the the most savage and depraved, each student is faced with the moral dilemma, to kill or be killed, and if you do kill, how do you choose who to kill first?

It gets you thinking about your friends and the people who you trust. Should push comes to shove, can you take not only a life, but your best mate's? How sure are you that your friends are playing you? How would you feel if your friend had no reservations in killing you off if it meant their survival? When I first came across Battle Royale, it was through the movie. I spent a good thirty minutes after the movie discussing who could do the dirty deed. What I got from it was that apparently guys who have completed their national service will be most likely to to have no qualms about killing anyone regardless of moral dilemma. Something about how the army has brainwashed them to think like a survivor and act accordingly. How true that is, I don't know, but it sure does freak me a little to think that there may be some truth in that hypothesis.

I love the Anglosized manga and the character, Shinji Mimura, even more. An intelligent jock with a ice-cold demeanour and an unattainable aura of cool, Mimura's teh man!!!111!! So it kills me to think about some pretty blonde hair, blue-eyed twentysomething actor taking on the role of Mim. Christ, they'll probably re-name him Bob or something. Oh, Mim, how the mighty will be horribly casted and misplayed.

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Since I'm still not quite over the movie, here's a simple equation to sum up how I feel; Brick > Donnie Darko. Booya.

"You offend reason, sir."

I was honestly actually considering an update, a right and proper one. A sort of day-in-my-oh-so-whimsical-and-wit-filled-conversations-sorta-life post where I attempt to prove that there is more to me than pop culture, movies, celebrity goss, and useless trivia of the pop-culture-related kind. I mean, seriously. How many of you actually bothered to click on the Ralph Wiggums and Weezer links?

But then I found out that Brick has a release date of 10 August 2006 in Australia. And I decided to hang 'right and proper' posts, and right and properly squeal with glee.


Mate, say what you will about my penchant for going apeshit over movies that I have yet to even see the trailer for, but the last couple of movies I went absolutely bananas over and hyped up like so have been generally gold. Hmmm. Shaun of the Dead. Oh, <3.

-ahem-

Anyhoo.. it's got Joseph Gordon-Levitt. And the plot is about this guy, who found that girl dead, and he goes looking for that thing, which of course leads him to other things.. Also, it's got Lukas Haas. He of the "Hey, they made the international sign of the donut" in Mars Attack! I actually do sorta know the plot but it's a bit convulated and I don't explain things well. Seriously, I can't even tell jokes because usually 1) I can't remember how it ends and 2) I usually ruin the punchline owing to the fact that I can't remember how it ends. The two jokes that I do tell are usually received with what can only be politely referred to as 'less-than-enthusiasm'.

If you haven't already heard the only two jokes I can remember, here it is in all it's wordy glory.

Joke #1
Q: What smells funny?

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A: A clown fart.

Hee. It gets me all the time.

Joke #2
Joke #2 revolves around ten big pink ping-pong balls. It's likely that if you've heard it before you'll probably remember it. For life. As proven by my indescribably weak memory actually remembering this one. Anyhoo, it's bad. But I love telling it. If only because it's awesome in all it's simplicity.

I should also add that these jokes are not mine. The first one I picked up while in Costa Rica and the second I owe to someone in Scouts.

Oh! I just remembered a blonde joke too!

Q: A blonde and a brunette jump from the balcony of a high-rise building. Who reaches the bottom first?
A: The brunette. The blonde has to stop and ask for directions.

Tee hee.

And hell, I've got one of those kind of jokes too.

A dyslexic walks into a bra.

Hee hee hee. "Oh, the cleverness of me!" I suppose I do know more than two bad jokes. I guess I actually know four bad ones.

Right. Onwards to a 'right and proper' post then. Thanks to the Earth's cycle, Australia is currently at the start of a particularly horrid winter. I only say it's particularly horrid because it's happening, like, right now, and I can't actually remember how last year's winter was. So, the usual whinging commences then.

I AM COLD. Taking into account the whole matter of me disliking the cold, and rain if I may add, I'm in a ripe ol' mood most days. Luckily because my anti-social tendencies are proportionately inverse to the quantity of heat in the air, I have become a DVD-watching hermit, bundled under my doona, with the heater and the stove turned on. So, yeah. No witty conversations to blog about this time round folks.