Friday, July 27, 2007

Oi, you racist!

Actually, it's more like 'national-ist'. Spank you very much.

Differentiating McDonald's customers by their nationality.

Australians - Cheeseburgers, Big Macs, Quarters.. they are a red meat loving lot.

The Australian vegetarian - will order a Big Mac with no meat. And fries. And an apple pie.

Singaporeans - are the only customers who request for no tartare sauce on their Fillet burgers. Usually of the female gender. Coincidentally, their physiques usually resemble a really really thin rail.

Malaysians - usually request for ketchup instead once they find out that a sweet and sour sauce packet costs 50 cents.

Indians - "What item on your menu has no meat?" For some reason, also dislikes ice in their cokes. Only 1% uses their Ps and Qs when ordering. Will usually ignore when I say "Thank you, come again." Dudes, it's comedy gold!

The Japanese - Almost always order a "Mc-Ozzie". Will then get flustered when I say, "a McOz (pronounced Aus.) in a meal or by itself?"

Americans - only ever have their coffee black. Double quarter pounders and triple cheeseburgers sell really well with this crowd.

The English and the Irish- Regardless of what they order, are usually rather curt. Unless drunk.

Ze French- love their cafe lattes.

The Italians - will sip their machiattos while having a boisterous chat that will attract the attention of other customers.

The Chinese - will almost always require a translator or a Mandarin speaking server. Regardless of explanation or gesturing will usually end up choosing either the fish or chicken burger. Will go on to glare and give me the evil eye when I answer to being Chinese but not speaking Mandarin.