Those housewives aren't desperate. Just dumb.

Dear Mr Tarantino,

I recently watched your Kill BIll films for the second time and it has come to my attention that a few things need to be said. Firstly, thank you for bringing a new appreciation to Chinese films. I'm sure the world now knows that Chinese kung fu, and I use the term very loosely, films did not die with the passing of Bruce Lee (assuming of course that they had miss all the fuss about Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. I know I did). I'm glad to see that the many hours you spent as a kid in a darkened basement consuming these films have not affected your eyesight- I don't see no specs in pictures taken of you. Also, congratulations on finding such a versatile actress, Uma Thurman, to portray the complex character of The Bride. In fact, congratulations on finding such a great cast. Who knew David Carradine still had it in him? Ms Thurman certainly deserved the Oscar nomination. One question though. As her close friend, why oh why didn't you advise her against starring in Be Cool?

Right. A few other things to say. I'm not sure if you realised it, but there is a fine line between paying tribute to/paying homage to and plain ol' imitation. Reading the IMDb trivia made me realise just how much stuff you've 'referred' to in the movie. No doubt one has to give credit to the Shaw Brothers for pioneering the wu xia genre. But 'copying + pasting' sure isn't the way. I think you did a fantastic job with Reservoir Dogs. Absolutely brilliant casting and plot (But what's this rumour about you copying the plot storyline from some other Chinese film?). Although maybe your little cameo was quite unnecessary. You're a good director. The same really cannot be said about your acting skills.

Considering the success of your films so far, it's safe to say that there obviously is something going for you. Personally, I think you're a good director. I really love the use of long shots in your films. Sadly, you haven't reached the ranks of greatness yet. I think if you used your films to develop a distinctive directing style you could be on to something. And yes, that means no more 'copying + pasting' plus editing by putting some blond hair on. Maybe over time eh?

Now how's about you do something about Infernal Affairs? Please oh please dear god, don't let it be released in 2007/8 with Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise as the leads and Colin Ferrel in the place of Anthony Wong. *vomit out contents of the day... Ooo. I had pasta and an orange* I speak on behalf of myself when I say use your power to buy the rights and then, leave it as it is. You'd rank much, much higher in my good books.

Sincerely,
Karen


***Hmmm. Talking about Desperate Housewives. Seriously, I agree with what Ad was saying. With the demise of Friends and Frasier, the title of 'Cool New Intriguing Series That Is Not A CSI or ER Hybird' has been up for grabs. Just a case of being there at the right time. Blehh.